I've been sort of struggling with a big decision. If you've followed me from the beginning - or even half way - you know that I’ve always been a 'slow loser'. This hasn't made this journey easy for me at all. I have to bust my ass for every pound while watching others just melt away with little effort. I was willing to accept it as long as I was losing. A lifetime of obesity doesn't resolve itself overnight. But the more this drags out, the more I have to consider how far I am going to take this.

My goal/hope was always to lose 100 pounds. That would put me on the high end of the 'ideal' weight for my height. As I inch closer to my goal, the scale is, of course, creeping. This is expected for anyone, but for me, considering the way I lose so slowly, its increasingly frustrating. So I am beginning to wonder if I should call an end to the weight loss journey and go into transition and then maintenance. 

This is an incredibly hard decision for me. All of my life, it’s been rare for me to follow through on goals. I rarely excel at anything - and up until now, weight loss never even made the list of things I marginally excelled at. So I have a lot of disappointment in myself that I am even considering this. I worry that I will feel unfulfilled in this choice and have nothing but anger, regret and disappointment in myself if I stop before I hit 100 pounds.

On the other hand, maybe my body is just done and doesn't want to lose anymore. Even though I still have a significant amount of belly fat, almost every day I have people tell me 'You don't look like you have anything left to lose.' I smile politely and think about my measurements (below) and disagree in my head while thanking them for the compliment. Then I wonder how much of the bulk that is left is just sagging skin. And how much of that accounts for the 'extra' weight? My arms and thighs have barely changed since November.

	Nov. 14, 2011	May 14, 2012
Thighs	24"	22"
Arms	13"	12"

Sigh. Not much happening there. I mean really, I should show y'all what it looks like when I 'tuck' the skin up. I really do wonder how much those bat wings weigh.

Back to the issue at hand. To call it a day or not.

I’m nervous to go into maintenance but more than anything, scared that I will feel as though I have failed at this. Because right now as I consider my options, despite all the huge changes I’ve made in my life, I feel like a failure at the idea of not hitting 100lbs. But I want to do what is best for my health. Do I continue to push and push and possibly force my body to do something it simply shouldn't be doing? Or do I forge ahead and meet this goal come hell or high water?

This shouldn't be so gut-wrenching. I've lost 90 pounds to date. NINETY! I run, like, a lot of miles. I make healthy choices that encompass every aspect of my life from food to environment to mental state. I'm doing all the right things despite my urges to just hang out on the couch.

So why is this 100 pound goal so important to me when I've accomplished so much already?

Because it means freedom. It means breaking away from who I was, or rather the person I've pigeon-holed myself into being for so many years. The person that doesn't follow through, the person that doesn't make or reach goals, the person who doubts herself, her talents and doesn't allow herself to live life to the fullest.

I am better than what I've allowed myself to be. I am bigger than my past, brighter than my present. And the future it's unlimited - if I work harder, if I push, and if I let myself attempt something greater than the limitations I set for myself.

I'm not ready to make a concrete and final decision on when to end this journey. For now I am setting a goal of four weeks. Four weeks from today, if I have not yet met my goal of 100 pounds, I will make a final decision. Today I'm going to continue to challenge myself. Right now, ten pounds in a month seems just as possible as it does impossible. But life is full of infinite possibilities. I will no longer deny myself opportunity because of a little fear and doubt.

Month One: -16 lbs

Month Two: -5 lbs
Month Three: -6 lbs
Month Four: -6 lbs
Month Five: -6 lbs
Month Six: -8.5 lbs

Month Seven: -7.5 lbs

Month Eight: -5 lbs

Month Nine: -2 lbs

Month Ten: -5 lbs

Month Eleven: -6 lbs

Month Twelve: -4 lbs

Month Thirteen: -6.5 lbs

Month Fourteen: -3.5 lbs

Month Fifteen: -1 lbs

Week sixty two: 1 WHAT?! WHAT?! (its actually 1lb and some change. But we are just gonna call it 1)

Week sixty three: 1

Total: 90 lbs gone forever! Current weight: 150 lbs Distance from goal: 10 lbs!!

Date	Bust	Waist	Hips	Thighs	Arms
4/23-4/30	36"	35.5"	39.5"	22"	12"
5/1-5/7	35.5"	33"	38"	22"	12"

Medifast recently introduced a new customer savings program. If you use my coupon code, TURNIP56, and sign up for Medifast Advantage when you order $250+, you’ll receive 56 free Medifast Meals and free shipping! Medifast Advantage has a lot of perks, including free customizable meals and a free BlenderBottle® with minimum purchase.

For your first order of $250+, use my code, and enroll in Medifast Advantage to receive 28 free meals. Do the same on your next order and you’ll receive ANOTHER 28 free meals! This offer is only valid if you enroll in Medifast Advantage, and it’s limited to one per customer. It’s not valid with prior purchases, any other promotions or discounts, or for Medifast Ready-to-Drink Shakes. Check out Medifast’s website for complete details on program and discounts.

*FTC Disclosure: Medifast provides their products for my personal use for free. I am not paid or compensated in any other way for mentioning their products. All thoughts written here are mine. I love complaining so I would tell you if I didn't like something in the program. :)
Medifast products and the Medifast Program are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease or illness. Any medical improvements noted while on the program are related to weight loss in general, and not to Medifast products or programs.

A Grande Life

O My Family

The Domestic Buzz

A Very Busy Mama

Gaithersburg-Rockville Macaroni Kid

Real Mom Media

Two Frugal Mommas

Single Mom on a Budget

Couponing to Disney

Jenni from the Blog (maintaining since summer ’11)

The Adventures of Goober Grape and Monkey Man (maintaining since April ’11)

Unemployed Mom (maintaining since April ’12)

It's official.

I'm a runner.

I've always been hesitant to pin this label on myself. I guess I didn't feel like I was doing anything really amazing or wonderful. But yesterday, as I came over the hill into mile four and saw the sea of people in front of me, I knew I had arrived. 

All rights reserved by Independence Blue Cross

I was one of over 33,000 runners that would complete the race that day.

I was scared going into Sunday morning. Honest to god scared out of my mind. I couldn't fall asleep Saturday night. I remember looking at the clock for the last time at 1230am and thinking to myself that I might cry when the alarm was set to go off at 415am. I had to make the early morning journey into the city by myself. I had hoped to connect with friends that were running. But in a crowd of 30k+ I knew it would be impossible. Every minute from the time I left my house to the minute I was in my corral was jam packed with anxiety. 

I was so worried that I'd get lost getting into the city (I did), or not be able to find my way to the train to get to the start. I was fortunate enough to latch onto meet a very nice woman, Sarah, who was also there alone. Poor Sarah. When I'm nervous I either clam up completely or talk way too much. Today was her lucky day, I was in the mood to chat. 

The trains were PACKED and we all got to know each other on a much more personal level.

On the long train ride I had a nice conversation with a man named Paul. He had done the Broad Street Run several times and was giving me lots of great tips. His best tip was to start out slow and not burn myself out after the first few miles.

Finally the train dropped us off and another wave of nerves hit me. In addition to being chatty, when I get anxious...ummm...I also have to pee a lot. And the lines to the porto-potties were looooooong.

Sarah stuck with me until the porto-potties and then we parted ways to go to our corrals.

I was in the pink corrall, the back of the pack. I went back and forth over whether this was a good thing or not. Ultimately it proved to be mostly annoying because the pink corral was not released until almost 45 minutes after the official start time. Understandable though when you consider the amazing volume of people participating in the race.

While I was waiting, I spotted these ladies from Black Girls Run. I had never heard of the group before and was curious about their mission. They explained that the group was started in 2009 by Toni Carey and Ashley Hicks to encourage African American women to take charge of their health and fitness and tackle the obesity epidemic among AA women. Did you know that 80% of African American women are overweight? And apparently about 60% of white women are overweight, and 75% of Hispanic women. LADIES! What the hell are we doing to ourselves? 

I am loving the mission of Black Girls Run and wish I could be an honorary member ;) I mean, y'all should have seen the back of their shirts. I love their tag line: Preserving the Sexy. Let me tell you, those gals looked great and certainly lived up to the slogan!

I killed a lot of time with people watching and eavesdropping on other's conversations hoping to pick up running tips. Mostly I heard stories about how people regretted going out to celebrate Cinco de Mayo.

There was lots and lots of waiting. The monotony was occasionally broken up by sights like this:

Finally it's 830am, the official start time of the race and the set free the first corral of runners

I wasn't even through the first mile before the doubt started to set in. Could I really do this? I felt like I couldn't even make it through the first mile. I was totally psyching myself out. I turned my music up and tuned out everything around me. I promised myself that if I really needed to, I could walk for a minute after the third mile. The time passed so quickly that when I hit the third mile, I promised myself I could walk at four. By the time I got to four I told myself there was no point in walking now, let's see how much further I could go. It went on like that for miles and miles. Much of my inner dialogue consisted of convincing myself I could make it to the next mile marker, challenging myself to at least run until I hit a certain landmark I saw ahead. 

I distracted myself by looking at all the buildings as I ran down the street. Philadelphia has so many gorgeous and intricate murals all over the city. I was even more appreciative of them yesterday as they took me away from the pain in my legs for just a moment. I'm also grateful for all the spectators along the way. All the people that live along Broad Street that came out to cheer us on. All of the rock bands that dragged their equipment out to the sidewalks to play Stone Temple Pilots and the Rocky theme for us. The African drum band that helped me pick up my pace. And the guy that yelled at me to pick up my knees (I did!) and the woman that told us there was booze at the end (did she know me?).

And that was all before we even hit City Hall. I could see William Penn up ahead and thought to myself I'd never make it that far without walking. But before I knew it, we were rounding the circle that encompasses city hall and I was coming up on mile six, high-fiving former Gov. Ed Rendell! 

Finally after crossing the threshold of mile eight, my exhaustion caught up with me, as well as a stabbing pain in my knees. I didn't want to stop. I argued with myself, knowing that if I stopped I'd never get back up to speed. In the end I decided it was best to stop for just a moment. I was beyond thirsty and decided to walk along the line of water tables just taking one drink after another. I only walked for about 30 seconds - but as I predicted I was never able to make up the time. I had been running at a pace of about 10:50 but my average pace for the race was 11:14.

When I started running again, it seemed like mile nine would never be upon us. Every time I thought I saw the blue flag mile marker ahead, I was woefully mistaken. I was in so much pain. I just wanted to be done. At one point it pissed me off enough to go faster.  All the while chanting in my head something my friend Kiely had said to me once: "Running is faster than walking. If I run, I know I'll get to stop sooner.' So wise.

It was around 9.5 miles that I happened to look over in the crowd and saw Tony Luke Jr. In the past year he's dropped over 100lbs and is a great source of inspiration to myself and others. I made a bee line to the side of the road to say hi and was so pleased that he remembered me from The Diet Bet competition I participated in a few months ago. 

It was in that moment that the last year of my life came flooding back to me. All the progress I have made and I'm making. And I remembered the radio show I was listening to at 5am on my way into the city. There was a woman talking about how people can change their lives. I really don't remember a lot of what she said but the one thing that stuck with me and what I recalled in that moment was her saying 'Be an agent of change. Don't just change your life. Help others facilitate change in their lives as well.' My feet got lighter, my knees got higher and for just a moment when both of my feet were off the ground, I was flying. I want to be an agent of change. I don't know how...but I want to help people change.

Those thoughts are what got me to the finish line. Not the need to finish or trying to beat a time goal I had in my head. It was the thought that - even though I don't know how, what or where I'm going, a path is being cleared in front of me. I'm not sure yet where it's going but I'm willing to keep logging the miles to find out.

I did have a scary moment at the end of the race. A few yards past the finish line, my throat started to close up. A huge wave of emotion just came crashing over me and I was suddenly completely overwhelmed by the events of the day. I quickly spied a medic and went to stand next to him. I knew I would be okay if I could just relax. But the harder I tried, the worse it got. I was wheezing and gasping for air; it felt like I was breathing through a coffee stirrer. The medic encouraged me to go to the ambulance. I didn't want to take up space that someone else might need because I knew I'd be okay. Spectators kept touching me and asking what I needed. Between gasps I asked them to just let me stand here and calm down. I probably should have just gone to the medical tent but I'm stubborn and knew I'd be okay. Then some jerk from the Navy came over and barked at me to keep moving. I almost wished I had passed out just then and made him feel like an ass. Jerk.

You can see me in all my wheezing glory at the 33 second mark:

This is actually right before I stopped to have my wheezing/ugly crying fit.

After I collected myself I received my medal and spent the better part of an hour trying to track down Christian and Izzy. So many people were calling and texting their loved ones that it was impossible to get a signal. I just kept searching for Christian's giant beard or hoping that I'd see Izzy riding on his shoulders. No such luck. Finally one text from him came through letting me know where they were...about 20 feet from where I had been standing, feeling hopelessly lost and giving up on ever recovering my family. 

Christian wanted to take my picture with my medal. I tried so hard to smile but just could not muster the energy.

Even though I'm exhausted and my knees feel like I missed a payment to a loan shark, I have to say, I'm a little sad it's over. Sure, I have lots of 5k's lined up for the Summer and the Warrior Dash - but I will be counting the days until the next Broad Street Run. I feel like I'm forgetting pieces so I may go on about this some more later. Because y'all...I ran 10 mother humpin miles with 33k+ other runners!

I met my goal of finishing in under two hours!

I'm loving this video someone made that is a first person view of the race.

• • •

Let's talk Medifast! So for the past two weeks I've been doing the 4&2 plan without much movement on the scale. I'm happy to report that this morning I was down just over another pound! YAY!

But I'm going to be an annoying flip-flopper. Now that I am done with the 10-miler, I'm switching back to the 5&1. After talking to Jen, my Medifast dietitian, we decided it might be in my best interest to back off on the exercise a bit and get back on 5&1 until I hit my goal. I agree - mostly because I'm exhausted, mentally and physically - mostly physically - and I need a little break. This doesn't mean I am couch-bound by any means. It just means I won't be running as far and may cut back to four days a week instead of nearly every day. 

I also took measurements this week again. Here's the progress so far:
4/23-4/30
Bust: 36"
Waist: 35.5"
Hips: 39.5"
Thigh: 22"
Arms: 12"


5/1-5/7
Bust: 35.5"
Waist: 33"
Hips: 38"
Thigh: 22"
Arms: 12"

My thighs and arms will be my trouble zones for life. They've always been big but there is so much extra skin right now. I'm hoping some more 30 Day Shred will continue to tighten things up. I'm pretty stoked that in a week I've lost so much in my waist and hips!

So what do we think? Can I get this knocked out by the end of May?

Month One: -16 lbs

Month Two: -5 lbs
Month Three: -6 lbs
Month Four: -6 lbs
Month Five: -6 lbs
Month Six: -8.5 lbs

Month Seven: -7.5 lbs

Month Eight: -5 lbs

Month Nine: -2 lbs

Month Ten: -5 lbs

Month Eleven: -6 lbs
Month Twelve: -4 lbs
Month Thirteen: -6.5 lbs
Month Fourteen: -3.5 lbs
Month Fifteen: -1 lbs
Week sixty two: 1 WHAT?! WHAT?! (its actually 1lb and some change. But we are just gonna call it 1)

Total: 89 lbs gone forever! Current weight: 151 lbs Distance from goal: 11 lbs!!

Medifast recently introduced a new customer savings program. If you use my coupon code, TURNIP56, and sign up for Medifast Advantage when you order $250+, you’ll receive 56 free Medifast Meals and free shipping! Medifast Advantage has a lot of perks, including free customizable meals and a free BlenderBottle® with minimum purchase.

For your first order of $250+, use my code, and enroll in Medifast Advantage to receive 28 free meals. Do the same on your next order and you’ll receive ANOTHER 28 free meals! This offer is only valid if you enroll in Medifast Advantage, and it’s limited to one per customer. It’s not valid with prior purchases, any other promotions or discounts, or for Medifast Ready-to-Drink Shakes. Check out Medifast’s website for complete details on program and discounts.

*FTC Disclosure: Medifast provides their products for my personal use for free. I am not paid or compensated in any other way for mentioning their products. All thoughts written here are mine. I love complaining so I would tell you if I didn't like something in the program. :) 

Medifast products and the Medifast Program are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease or illness. Any medical improvements noted while on the program are related to weight loss in general, and not to Medifast products or programs.

~*Stephanie at A Grande Life*~ 
~*Jenni at Jenni From the Blog*~

~*Stephanie at Goober Monkey*~

~*Alison at O My Family*~

~*Jessica at The Unemployed Mom*~

~*Mariana at The Domestic Buzz*~

Well...I didn't make it past 100 votes. At least, I don't think I did. Blogher closed the voting thus making the finally tally private. (Which I don't understand - but whatever.) When I last checked yesterday afternoon, I was up to 43 votes. I think that will be enough to get me to the judging table in my category. 

I know that I had to throw a cheap gimmick out there to get y'all to vote - but the response - WOW! You all left me so many kind, thoughtful and kleenex worthy comments here and on Facebook. I am so touched by the response. No matter what happens with this competition, I've got my reward. Your words will be me forever. They will be cheering me on when I run the Broad Street Race this Sunday. When I train for and run a half marathon. And hopefully a marathon one day soon (but not too soon! My legs hurt.).  

As usual, I struggle to find the right words to adequately express to you how grateful I am for all of the kindness and support that everyone has shown me throughout this process. So even though I am sure I didn't make it to 100 votes, I'm gonna pony up with the bikini photo. I'm not sure if this is going to be a good thing or a punishment for y'all.

Ready?

Here we go...

I've really been working on my abs. And how about that hair?

Okay, okay. I'll make with the real deal now. But I feel the need to do a lot of prefacing. I know I don't look anything like the photo above. I am aware that I have a lot more work to do. I am also aware that my various body parts are like 15 different skin tones and that I need to go get a spray tan or something. Also, don't go blowing up this photo, cause my legs are totally unshaven. I have cellulite, stretch marks, a B belly and no boobs. 

But I've also got balls - which are conveniently tucked under the skirt. ;)

Okay, for real this time, here we go. Can someone hold my hand? Stream of conscious writing here...this is kinda, really hard. Harder then I thought it would be. Damn it.

::holding my breath::

I've written a lot of tough posts in the past but this is by far the hardest. I've always been okay with my body in clothes and such...but put me in a bathing suit and it's like one of those dreams where you accidentally show up to work naked. But I like what I see. A lot. To look at where I came from, to where I am now, I'm proud of that body even if it's not everyone's ideal.  That's an example of perseverance, hard work, good habits and healthy living in progress. That is pride. Though I will be working on that tan. That white belly just looks ridiculous.

I want to challenge you to try on a bikini and take a photo. You don't have to share it. You don't even have to buy it. But don't wait until your body is perfect - because it never will be. I know a lot of you have been working so hard right along with me. I hope you'll see all of your hard work and determination. I challenge you to get in that fitting room and LIKE what you see! 

• • •

I've been on the 4&2 plan for a full week now. It's been challenging but fun and somewhat of a relief. It started off (and continues to be) challenging because I've had to convince myself that eating more will help me lose weight. Crazy talk, right? Because eating more was how I got to be 240lbs to begin with. The difference is that now I'm eating good stuff. And I'm moving so much that my body wants and needs all of those good calories. It's been kind of fun too because I get to jazz up my meals. For example, for breakfast I'll have a Medifast pancake and now, on 4&2, I can have a piece of Morning Star Sausage with it. I have the ability to split up my first Lean & Green meal into side dishes with my other meals. And it's been a relief because, even though its moving slllloooooowly, the scale is moving again. I am down .5 this week for a grand total of 88lbs lost.

I also took measurements as promised. But I left the piece of paper I jotted them down on back at the house. So come back later today if you want to see my latest measurements, I'll be updating this post. Strangely my measurement have not changed much since I last did them in November. But my clothes and scale certainly tell a different story. Muscle, maybe? Who knows. It's more likely that I incorrectly measured myself. Anyway, they'll be up later.

Thank you again for your support and your amazing comments. THANK YOU!

Month One: -16 lbs

Month Two: -5 lbs
Month Three: -6 lbs
Month Four: -6 lbs
Month Five: -6 lbs
Month Six: -8.5 lbs

Month Seven: -7.5 lbs

Month Eight: -5 lbs

Month Nine: -2 lbs

Month Ten: -5 lbs

Month Eleven: -6 lbs
Month Twelve: -4 lbs
Month Thirteen: -6.5 lbs
Week fifty three: -1.5
Week fifty four: -.5
Week fifty five: -.5
Week fifty six: 0 :(
Week fifty seven: -1
Week fifty eight: 0 bleh.
Week fifty nine: .5

Week sixty: Unknown
Week sixty one: .5 (I'll take it!)

Total: 88 lbs gone forever! Current weight: 152 lbs Distance from goal: 12 lbs!!

Medifast recently introduced a new customer savings program. If you use my coupon code, TURNIP56, and sign up for Medifast Advantage when you order $250+, you’ll receive 56 free Medifast Meals and free shipping! Medifast Advantage has a lot of perks, including free customizable meals and a free BlenderBottle® with minimum purchase.

For your first order of $250+, use my code, and enroll in Medifast Advantage to receive 28 free meals. Do the same on your next order and you’ll receive ANOTHER 28 free meals! This offer is only valid if you enroll in Medifast Advantage, and it’s limited to one per customer. It’s not valid with prior purchases, any other promotions or discounts, or for Medifast Ready-to-Drink Shakes. Check out Medifast’s website for complete details on program and discounts.

*FTC Disclosure: Medifast provides their products for my personal use for free. I am not paid or compensated in any other way for mentioning their products. All thoughts written here are mine. I love complaining so I would tell you if I didn't like something in the program. :) 
Medifast products and the Medifast Program are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease or illness. Any medical improvements noted while on the program are related to weight loss in general, and not to Medifast products or programs.

~*Stephanie at A Grande Life*~ 
~*Jenni at Jenni From the Blog*~

~*Stephanie at Goober Monkey*~

~*Alison at O My Family*~

~*Jessica at The Unemployed Mom*~

~*Mariana at The Domestic Buzz*~

Things that happened this week:

• I switched to 4&2. Yup, I bit the bullet and did it. Now I have 4 Medifast meals and 2 Lean & Green Meals. I'm exercising too much to be successful on the 5&1. That sounds negative - but its not. This is a good thing. This is progress. I'm no longer in a vegetative state on my couch more often than not. In fact, I'm moving so much that my body is all 'Whoa! Either you feed me more or I'm holding the rest of this chub hostage!'. You win body, you win. Now release the chub. 

• I went to a consignment shop and tried on a pair of size 8 shorts. They were a tad tight in the lady bits area but totally fit. I bought them. Granted I will not be wearing them until they fit properly - because no one wants to see that. But I bought them for a little motivation and because I know I will be in them soon enough.

 

quit lookin' at my area.

• I made some new recipes from Medifast foods. Recipe cards below. 

• I did the 30 Day Shred every other day, as planned. I plan to do another week of Level One since I'm not doing it every day (alternating with running). I've never gotten through more than a few days of 30DS. Pretty pleased with myself that I've kept it up.

That's The Bitch, watching me do the 30DS. She sat there and meowed
at me for dinner the entire time. And that's why we call her The Bitch.

• I ran 10 miles! Broad Street Run, here I come!

This is what I looked like after that run - ready to die.

This is the bulging vein I discovered in my forehead after my run.
I named it Annie. Annie the Aneurysm.

I'm so proud of myself. I've had a lot of doubt as to whether I'd successfully complete a 10 mile race - even if it is mostly downhill (according to my friend Kiely who will be running it with me). I had Friday off from work and thought I'd log about 6 miles. As I rounded the corner to mile 4, I decided to try for 8. By the time I hit 8 miles, I decided 'hey, what's another 2? I may as well see how long 10 miles will take me since the race is only fifteen days away.'

At times, it seemed like the miles would never end. My time isn't terribly impressive and I had to do several short intervals of walking (though I was stoked to take on the hills like a beast!).

Things that didn't happen this week:

• I didn't weigh myself. What? That's like cheating! You HAVE to weigh in every week! 

Look, you can call it a cop-out and give me some side-eye if you want. But I chose to not weigh myself this week and that's that. That doesn't mean I've been binging, will binge or fall off the wagon all-together. I'm more dedicated than ever to meet my goal. I've even signed up for the new Under Armour "What's Beautiful" campaign and accepted numerous challenges on TribeSports.

It's simply that the numbers on the scale are making me crazy. I can see and feel changes in my body but those numbers aren't changing. Logically I know this means I'm creating muscle (and then there is the aforementioned deficit in calories problem). But when you spend a year on the scale with nearly constant results and it finally stops moving - that's a tough pill to swallow. Weighing in every few days and seeing no progress, despite everything else I know, it takes a toll. And since this journey is as much about my mental state as my physical state, I made the choice to take a break from the scale rather than backing myself into a corner and creating an opportunity for a complete meltdown and failure.

I plan to resume my weigh-in's next Monday. Good or bad I will report my numbers. But in addition to scale numbers I'll be reporting measurements as well.

Good things are happening and its the good things that count the most. 

Before I get to the recipes, I found this on Pinterest and thought it summed up my blog pretty well. 

Source: fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net via Kelly on Pinterest

I'm not perfect, not try to reach perfection and have no desire to be perfect. I just want to deal with life, weight loss and fitness in a healthy way. Imperfections and all. 

• • •

SouthWest Flat bread (so good with hummus!)

• • •

Orange Spice Pancakes

You can swap out spice pancakes for Chocolate Chip.

 • • •

Strawberry Shortcake with Creamy Strawberry Spread

 

Month One: -16 lbs

Month Two: -5 lbs
Month Three: -6 lbs
Month Four: -6 lbs
Month Five: -6 lbs
Month Six: -8.5 lbs

Month Seven: -7.5 lbs

Month Eight: -5 lbs

Month Nine: -2 lbs

Month Ten: -5 lbs

Month Eleven: -6 lbs
Month Twelve: -4 lbs
Month Thirteen: -6.5 lbs
Week fifty three: -1.5
Week fifty four: -.5
Week fifty five: -.5
Week fifty six: 0 :(
Week fifty seven: -1
Week fifty eight: 0 bleh.
Week fifty nine: .5

Week sixty: Unknown

Total: 87.5 lbs gone forever! Current weight: 152.5 lbs Distance from goal: 12.5 lbs!!

Medifast recently introduced a new customer savings program. If you use my coupon code, TURNIP56, and sign up for Medifast Advantage when you order $250+, you’ll receive 56 free Medifast Meals and free shipping! Medifast Advantage has a lot of perks, including free customizable meals and a free BlenderBottle® with minimum purchase.

For your first order of $250+, use my code, and enroll in Medifast Advantage to receive 28 free meals. Do the same on your next order and you’ll receive ANOTHER 28 free meals! This offer is only valid if you enroll in Medifast Advantage, and it’s limited to one per customer. It’s not valid with prior purchases, any other promotions or discounts, or for Medifast Ready-to-Drink Shakes. Check out Medifast’s website for complete details on program and discounts.

*FTC Disclosure: Medifast provides their products for my personal use for free. I am not paid or compensated in any other way for mentioning their products. All thoughts written here are mine. I love complaining so I would tell you if I didn't like something in the program. :) 
Medifast products and the Medifast Program are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease or illness. Any medical improvements noted while on the program are related to weight loss in general, and not to Medifast products or programs.

~*Stephanie at A Grande Life*~ 
~*Jenni at Jenni From the Blog*~

~*Stephanie at Goober Monkey*~

~*Alison at O My Family*~

~*Jessica at The Unemployed Mom*~

~*Mariana at The Domestic Buzz*~

Source: google.com via Kathryn on Pinterest

Movement.

It's so important in weight loss. But when the numbers on the scale are not moving, sometimes you are not only stuck physically but mentally as well. Its so damn frustrating especially when you believe you are doing all the right things. And I think I am doing all the right things. However, here I sit, letting you know that I am down a measly half pound this week.

I don't mind telling you, this sucks. It sucks a lot.

Especially when I was so confident that I'd step on that scale this morning and see a big drop. I even closed my eyes before I stepped on the scale this morning. I had it all built up in my head that I was going to be down at least 3 pounds. I thought for sure that changing up my exercise routine would kick start some weight loss.

I am currently alternating the 30 Day Shred with running. I can feel a difference in my body. So something is happening. My tightest jeans are a slim cut 12 in non-stretchy denim. In the past week, they are practically falling off of me. Even fresh out of the dryer I still find myself pulling them up and readjusting my belt. So I was beyond shocked to see such a paltry loss this week.

But I must keep moving forward. I'm moving forward mentally by not letting my mind drag me down. I'm not giving into those feelings of 'This isn't working the same anymore. Why should I bother?'. Instead I am determined to move forward with the plan that's in place. I'm going to stick with the 5&2 until the end of the month. If I don't see some decent results on the scale, I will try the 4&2 plan (for real this time). I'm letting myself feel good about seeing new changes in my body - even if they aren't reflected on the scale the way I hoped they would be.

I'm going to keep moving forward physically, setting new goals and completing the ones I have in place. Check out my running ticker! I've logged 94 miles in 10 weeks! With the 10 mile Broad Street Race coming up on May 6th, all the 5k's I've signed up for over the summer, the Warrior Dash and as well as my every day exercising, I will meet (and hopefully exceed) my goal of 250 miles by August 3rd in no time. In fact I'll be wrapping up my running goal by participating in the BlogHer'12 5k Fun Run through NYC.

Source: blogher.com via Kelly on Pinterest

When I return from BlogHer'12, I plan to pick my first half marathon.

Just let that sink in for a minute. Its barely been eight months since I seriously began running. The person that could barely get off the couch let alone get a mile under her feet.

Half Marathon
Tough Mudder
Marathon

These things will happen...and so will movement on the scale.

I'm not getting stuck. I'm not giving up. I'm not giving in. I am getting a move on. 

I even got new kicks to keep me going. :)

Month One: -16 lbs

Month Two: -5 lbs
Month Three: -6 lbs
Month Four: -6 lbs
Month Five: -6 lbs
Month Six: -8.5 lbs

Month Seven: -7.5 lbs

Month Eight: -5 lbs

Month Nine: -2 lbs

Month Ten: -5 lbs

Month Eleven: -6 lbs
Month Twelve: -4 lbs
Month Thirteen: -6.5 lbs
Week fifty three: -1.5
Week fifty four: -.5
Week fifty five: -.5
Week fifty six: 0 :(
Week fifty seven: -1
Week fifty eight: 0 bleh.
Week fifty nine: .5

Total: 87.5 lbs gone forever! Current weight: 152.5 lbs Distance from goal: 12.5 lbs!!

Medifast recently introduced a new customer savings program. If you use my coupon code, TURNIP56, and sign up for Medifast Advantage when you order $250+, you’ll receive 56 free Medifast Meals and free shipping! Medifast Advantage has a lot of perks, including free customizable meals and a free BlenderBottle® with minimum purchase.

For your first order of $250+, use my code, and enroll in Medifast Advantage to receive 28 free meals. Do the same on your next order and you’ll receive ANOTHER 28 free meals! This offer is only valid if you enroll in Medifast Advantage, and it’s limited to one per customer. It’s not valid with prior purchases, any other promotions or discounts, or for Medifast Ready-to-Drink Shakes. Check out Medifast’s website for complete details on program and discounts.

*FTC Disclosure: Medifast provides their products for my personal use for free. I am not paid or compensated in any other way for mentioning their products. All thoughts written here are mine. I love complaining so I would tell you if I didn't like something in the program. :) 
Medifast products and the Medifast Program are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease or illness. Any medical improvements noted while on the program are related to weight loss in general, and not to Medifast products or programs.

~*Stephanie at A Grande Life*~ 
~*Jenni at Jenni From the Blog*~

~*Stephanie at Goober Monkey*~

~*Alison at O My Family*~

~*Jessica at The Unemployed Mom*~

~*Mariana at The Domestic Buzz*~