Source: google.com via Kathryn on Pinterest

Movement.

It's so important in weight loss. But when the numbers on the scale are not moving, sometimes you are not only stuck physically but mentally as well. Its so damn frustrating especially when you believe you are doing all the right things. And I think I am doing all the right things. However, here I sit, letting you know that I am down a measly half pound this week.

I don't mind telling you, this sucks. It sucks a lot.

Especially when I was so confident that I'd step on that scale this morning and see a big drop. I even closed my eyes before I stepped on the scale this morning. I had it all built up in my head that I was going to be down at least 3 pounds. I thought for sure that changing up my exercise routine would kick start some weight loss.

I am currently alternating the 30 Day Shred with running. I can feel a difference in my body. So something is happening. My tightest jeans are a slim cut 12 in non-stretchy denim. In the past week, they are practically falling off of me. Even fresh out of the dryer I still find myself pulling them up and readjusting my belt. So I was beyond shocked to see such a paltry loss this week.

But I must keep moving forward. I'm moving forward mentally by not letting my mind drag me down. I'm not giving into those feelings of 'This isn't working the same anymore. Why should I bother?'. Instead I am determined to move forward with the plan that's in place. I'm going to stick with the 5&2 until the end of the month. If I don't see some decent results on the scale, I will try the 4&2 plan (for real this time). I'm letting myself feel good about seeing new changes in my body - even if they aren't reflected on the scale the way I hoped they would be.

I'm going to keep moving forward physically, setting new goals and completing the ones I have in place. Check out my running ticker! I've logged 94 miles in 10 weeks! With the 10 mile Broad Street Race coming up on May 6th, all the 5k's I've signed up for over the summer, the Warrior Dash and as well as my every day exercising, I will meet (and hopefully exceed) my goal of 250 miles by August 3rd in no time. In fact I'll be wrapping up my running goal by participating in the BlogHer'12 5k Fun Run through NYC.

Source: blogher.com via Kelly on Pinterest

When I return from BlogHer'12, I plan to pick my first half marathon.

Just let that sink in for a minute. Its barely been eight months since I seriously began running. The person that could barely get off the couch let alone get a mile under her feet.

Half Marathon
Tough Mudder
Marathon

These things will happen...and so will movement on the scale.

I'm not getting stuck. I'm not giving up. I'm not giving in. I am getting a move on. 

I even got new kicks to keep me going. :)

Month One: -16 lbs

Month Two: -5 lbs
Month Three: -6 lbs
Month Four: -6 lbs
Month Five: -6 lbs
Month Six: -8.5 lbs

Month Seven: -7.5 lbs

Month Eight: -5 lbs

Month Nine: -2 lbs

Month Ten: -5 lbs

Month Eleven: -6 lbs
Month Twelve: -4 lbs
Month Thirteen: -6.5 lbs
Week fifty three: -1.5
Week fifty four: -.5
Week fifty five: -.5
Week fifty six: 0 :(
Week fifty seven: -1
Week fifty eight: 0 bleh.
Week fifty nine: .5

Total: 87.5 lbs gone forever! Current weight: 152.5 lbs Distance from goal: 12.5 lbs!!

Medifast recently introduced a new customer savings program. If you use my coupon code, TURNIP56, and sign up for Medifast Advantage when you order $250+, you’ll receive 56 free Medifast Meals and free shipping! Medifast Advantage has a lot of perks, including free customizable meals and a free BlenderBottle® with minimum purchase.

For your first order of $250+, use my code, and enroll in Medifast Advantage to receive 28 free meals. Do the same on your next order and you’ll receive ANOTHER 28 free meals! This offer is only valid if you enroll in Medifast Advantage, and it’s limited to one per customer. It’s not valid with prior purchases, any other promotions or discounts, or for Medifast Ready-to-Drink Shakes. Check out Medifast’s website for complete details on program and discounts.

*FTC Disclosure: Medifast provides their products for my personal use for free. I am not paid or compensated in any other way for mentioning their products. All thoughts written here are mine. I love complaining so I would tell you if I didn't like something in the program. :) 
Medifast products and the Medifast Program are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease or illness. Any medical improvements noted while on the program are related to weight loss in general, and not to Medifast products or programs.

~*Stephanie at A Grande Life*~ 
~*Jenni at Jenni From the Blog*~

~*Stephanie at Goober Monkey*~

~*Alison at O My Family*~

~*Jessica at The Unemployed Mom*~

~*Mariana at The Domestic Buzz*~

On Saturday we got a decent amount of snow that kept us indoors most of the day. It gave me the opportunity to sort through all the clothing in the house. Specifically it was my clothing that needed to be sorted the most. I was so excited to weed out all the clothes that are now too big for me. I was looking forward to selling some stuff on eBay, taking some to donation or giving away some clothes to friends. This felt like a graduation of sorts, finalizing this process, and in some ways making an honest woman of myself. I was so excited.

And then I wasn't.

As I sorted through the clothing, there was little joy in it. Rather there was anger, shame, confusion, mourning, doubt and an avalanche of fear.

Anger for all the things that have happened to me over the years that caused me to use food as therapy. Anger for the people, places and things that make me want to numb myself with food. Anger at myself for, in some ways, letting those people and things win and own a piece of my soul.

Shame that rather than resolving my issues I allowed myself to take the easy way out and eat myself into XXL shirts, size 24 pant and size 11 underwear.

Confusion because I still struggle to identify with this new and ever shrinking body. A body that at times feels so foreign to me that I have to fight the urge to reject it with every fiber of my being. Its mentally and physically exhausting to make peace with what I was and who I am becoming. And for as much as I value and want what I am working towards, it is a place of raw and exposed nerves. I often long for the comfort and shelter that old, overweight me provided.

Mourning the lies I used to live with. Mourning the passing of the days in which I could tell myself I'd change tomorrow or the next day or the next. Eulogizing my self destruction and the devil on my shoulder that pushes me down. Grieving the loss of the warm comfort that washes over you once you resign yourself to defeat and accept your loss.

Doubt is the voice in my head telling me I will need these things again one day.

Fear that I will fail. Not just at keeping the weight off but my ability to not transfer old behaviors into new problems and creating a bad example for Izzy. I fear will let my food addiction continue to manifest itself in other areas of my life. As I struggle with acceptance of my new life, I have to take stock of my habits on a daily basis. I have noticed an increase in my negative ADD behaviors. With that comes an increase of my (usually mild) OCD tendencies. Fear of the uphill battle ahead of me long after the pounds have been shed. Eliminating these items from my life is a very final and scary indicator that the me of the past is gone. But one slip could create an onslaught of poor choices. Then where will I be? Fat, naked and exposed.

I've been holding on to these clothes for years. Piles of jeans and shirts in various sizes that no longer fit at various stages of my life. What was I keeping them for? The contents of these boxes are relics of a life gone by. They are the belongings of a dead person long overdue to be buried and largely forgotten. They are useless and taking up space.

Much like all my reasons and excuses for holding onto the feelings associated with them.

One by one, box by box, I will free myself from the relics of a life no longer lived. I will release these things into the world and start anew. The pain of the past will not win. I will reclaim my soul and be at peace with who I am becoming.

• • • •

On Sunday we took Izzy to the Please Touch Museum in Philly. I took the opportunity to recreate a photo that I first shared with you when I began this journey.

Another pound bites the dust, twenty three pounds to go.

Month One: -16 lbs

Month Two: -5 lbs

Month Three: -6 lbs

Month Four: -6 lbs

Month Five: -6 lbs

Month Six: -8.5 lbs
Month Seven: -7.5 lbs
Month Eight: -5 lbs
Month Nine: -2 lbs
Month Ten: -5 lbs
Month Eleven: -6 lbs

Week forty five: -2

Week forty six: -1
Week forty seven: -1

Total: 77 lbs gone forever!
Current weight: 163 lbs
Distance from goal: 23 lbs!!

If you're interested in trying Medifast, I have a great deal for you! Use the code TURNIP56 to get $50 off an order of $275.


Check out Medifast's new customer savings program! 

*FTC Disclosure: Medifast provides their products for my personal use for free. I am not paid or compensated in any other way for mentioning their products. All thoughts written here are mine. I love complaining so I would tell you if I didn't like something in the program. :)

~*Stephanie at A Grande Life*~ 
~*Jenni at Jenni From the Blog*~

~*Stephanie at Goober Monkey*~

~*Alison at O My Family*~

~*Jessica at The Unemployed Mom*~

~*Mariana at The Domestic Buzz*~

Naturally, I follow a lot of weight loss blogs. I don't discriminate. I like blogs of people that use brand name diets that are not Medifast. I like blogs that don't use diets at all but choose instead to use old fashioned calorie counting. I'm interested in blogs that showcase non-traditional plans (hello? cave man diet?). I enjoy blogs that utilize none of the above and focus on something entirely different - perhaps not even losing weight at all but instead choosing to give up the battle and just be. I find inspiration in their motives, theories and struggles. I applaud, support and respect whatever their efforts might be. I appreciate each blogger's unique journey for what it is - their journey. 

And as unique as each blog and blogger is, almost all have one thing in common:

They hate your diet.

I've never been a competitive person. I never played sports and I rarely enter contests that require a voting process. I don't enjoy competing for trophies, badges, or status (unless there is money involved, then you can sway me ;) ). I especially do not enjoy every day competitions that come with keeping up with the Joneses. I don't care how much your house costs, how new your car is, what label is on your clothing or if you have a stable full of Lipizzaner stallions. Those things are so far off my radar that most times I could not even tell you what is considered luxury and I am generally unimpressed when people name drop and brag (though I am polite enough to pretend). 

So it wasn't until I became a mom that I realized how competitive people can be. Who's baby has what car seat, who walked first, how high can they count, who's baby is bilingual, who already has their ticket stamped for sainthood. I thought surely none could be more pious than the American parent.

Then I got into the world of the weight loss blogger. And let me preface by saying: y'all still rock. I've got mad respect for all you do and continue to do. But there seems to be this unending competition of diet vs healthy choices and frankly, I don't understand it.

I've written in the past about 'diet' being a four letter word. I do not see it as such. It's just a word. But among the weight loss bloggers it seems that if you use a 'diet' program versus a 'healthy choice' regimen you are not allowed in the inner circle of success stories. You are tolerated yet still somehow on the outside. 

It's wrong.

We are all looking to each other for support and inspiration on this journey and I think it is wrong to criticize and judge other people's methods of weight loss and/or means of getting healthy. Whether you are using a food delivery plan, counting points or calories, restricting certain foods or whatever your choice is - only you can say whether it is right for you. Though I will make an exception in the case of things like the HGC diet, or when you are sprinkling magic powders on your food or something insane like the Cotton Ball diet (in which you eat actual COTTON BALLS!! Can you hear me screaming?).

While some one else's method may not be for YOU, it is unfair of you to shame those who choose to use them. I’ve done them all the only plan I have ever been successful on is Medifast. And Medifast is not for everyone. Just as other ‘healthy choices’ (ahem. Medifast IS a healthy choice) such as calorie and point counting is not for everyone. Some people need a little extra help. I am one of those people.

I’m an obsessive over-eater. Calorie and point counting only exacerbated the issue because I was thinking about numbers incessantly until I’d give up and binge. On Medifast I still have to think about numbers and I still have to plan and make healthy choices. I'm still learning how to eat and more importantly think differently. Being on a plan like Medifast has allowed me the space to identify and work on the issues that caused me to become obese in the first place. 

Let's say that pre-Medifast, this was my brain:

Let's break this down.

Thanks to Medifast, lately my desk looks more like this:

photo from: Linniebell - a cute little crafty blog

Still a little messy but completely manageable. 

And hopefully one day it will be closer to this:

Okay, maybe that's a tad ambitious. But my point is that Medifast, a so-called 'diet' *gasp!* helped me go from an absolute disaster (that by all rights should have just had a lit match applied to it) to a manageable state of chaos. Once I hit goal, I will transition from the plan foods to real-world foods. I now have the peace and the tools to carry this journey through to the end. I’ve worked very hard on my ‘diet’ to fix not only the way I eat but to fix ME. And I think we all know that at the root of any successful weight loss plan is a person that has fixed themselves more so than their food.

My 'diet' is no better or worse than your so called healthy choices. It just happens to be what is working for me. I won’t try to convince anyone here what the better option is because only the individual can decide that. But I hope that you can see that this is the right choice for me and thousands of others that have gone on to live and maintain healthier lifestyles long after ceasing the program because of their choice.

I'm not interested in competing and arguing over who has the better plan. Weight loss is not one size fits all and there is no single ideal plan suitable for 100% of the population. So I don't hate your diet, plan or choices. I respect you for answering the call to action and support your efforts whatever tool you've decided to use. 

But ask me for a recommendation and I think you will know what I will say. ;)

• • • •

Slow week this week. I'm only down one pound. It's been stressful around here (a post for another time). And while I am happy to say that I've stayed on plan, the bummer is that when I am stressed, my body hangs onto the fat.

Also it has been wicked cold in the past week and that has put a damper on my running. However I scored some great UnderArmor cold weather gear at TJ Maxx this weekend that I can't wait to try out. I'm hoping this does the trick for me because the chill is very painful and even after being indoors for hours I've been experiencing extremely cold and numb extremities. If I don't see an improvement with the new gear I will be going to the doctor. It's pretty concerning to not be able to feel your toes for hours at a time.

Month One: -16 lbs

Month Two: -5 lbs

Month Three: -6 lbs

Month Four: -6 lbs

Month Five: -6 lbs

Month Six: -8.5 lbs
Month Seven: -7.5 lbs
Month Eight: -5 lbs
Month Nine: -2 lbs
Month Ten: -5 lbs
Month Eleven: -6 lbs

Week forty five: -2

Week forty six: -1

Total: 76 lbs gone forever!
Current weight: 164 lbs
Distance from goal: 24 lbs!!

If you're interested in trying Medifast, I have a great deal for you! Use the code TURNIP56 to get $50 off an order of $275.


Check out Medifast's new customer savings program! 

*FTC Disclosure: Medifast provides their products for my personal use for free. I am not paid or compensated in any other way for mentioning their products. All thoughts written here are mine. I love complaining so I would tell you if I didn't like something in the program. :)

~*Stephanie at A Grande Life*~ 
~*Jenni at Jenni From the Blog*~

~*Stephanie at Goober Monkey*~

~*Alison at O My Family*~

~*Jessica at The Unemployed Mom*~

~*Mariana at The Domestic Buzz*~

And you turn your life around. That's what it's all about!

Me and my kid, we are totally bad ass.

Flexin' our muscles!

Fist bump!

My little turnip helped me make the first step in fulfilling my resolution. On Saturday Izzy and I went roller skating. It was her first time and we had a blast.

We were both nervous at first. I explained to Izzy that if she fell, it might hurt but she'd be okay. She hung on my arm like a little monkey in a tree but quickly got over her fears.

Finally we were both brave enough to leave the carpeted area and try the rink. I was so nervous. All I could think about was falling and how awful it would be if I fell. Because if I fall, Izzy falls. I can't fall.

It was during a round of roller skating hokey pokey, I was reminded of why I do all of this. It's not to be thin. It's not so I can fit into smaller clothes. I'm not doing it so that I can run 3.1 miles in less time than it took me a week ago. It's not so I can join a roller derby team.

I'm doing it for her. 

She is the reason I've confronted my demons. She is the reason I want to run and roller skate and pay attention to what I put in my body. She is the reason I want to be healthy and live my longest and best life.

She is the reason I can't fall. 

She is the reason that I've put my whole self into this dance. 

She is what its all about.

• • • • •

The picture says it all. Down two more pounds this week - twenty five to go! 

Month One: -16 lbs

Month Two: -5 lbs

Month Three: -6 lbs

Month Four: -6 lbs

Month Five: -6 lbs

Month Six: -8.5 lbs
Month Seven: -7.5 lbs
Month Eight: -5 lbs
Month Nine: -2 lbs
Month Ten: -5 lbs
Month Eleven: -6 lbs

Week forty five: -2

Total: 75 lbs gone forever!
Current weight: 165 lbs
Distance from goal: 25 lbs!!

If you're interested in trying Medifast, I have a great deal for you! Use the code TURNIP56 to get $50 off an order of $275.


Check out Medifast's new customer savings program! 

*FTC Disclosure: Medifast provides their products for my personal use for free. I am not paid or compensated in any other way for mentioning their products. All thoughts written here are mine. I love complaining so I would tell you if I didn't like something in the program. :)

~*Stephanie at A Grande Life*~ 
~*Jenni at Jenni From the Blog*~

~*Stephanie at Goober Monkey*~

~*Alison at O My Family*~

~*Jessica at The Unemployed Mom*~

~*Mariana at The Domestic Buzz*~

I couldn't wait to post these with my Monday update. Tomorrow was too far away.

I can't believe this is me.

Last year I began the year with a non-resolution. I was of the opinion that resolutions just create undue pressure on situations that are probably already terribly stressful. 

This year I am of the opinion that the non-resolution is for the lazy, the unmotivated and those that are too scared of failure to make a true commitment to change.

Harsh? Yes. 

Here's where you can start hating me because this is going to be some tough love - on me and you. If 2012 Kelly could have sent a letter to 2011 Kelly, it probably would have gone something like this:

Dear Kelly,

You are lazy, unmotivated and worst of all, you are a coward. You are so afraid to fail that you wont even try and that is just shameful. I'm proud of you that you've learned to love yourself at every size but this is madness. You are killing yourself. What good is your mental health if you are not around to enjoy it?

We are talking about overcoming obesity, saving your life and setting a good example for your child. I'd rather tell you that you are lazy and scared and pray that you have a moment of clarity than to watch you kill yourself with food.

We don't live in a world where there is a perfect weight. We do however live in a world where people can find optimal health at a variety of weights. But morbidly obese is not one of those weights.

No doubt you are beautiful, smart, funny, lovely and wonderful human being. And its for all those reasons that you should take action and make a resolution.

Make a commitment.

Grow a pair and resolve to change.

Love, a better version of you  

I don't blame anyone for not resolving to make a change until they are ready. I think this is a decision that people need to come to in their own time. However, looking back on that post and knowing how us fat folks think, if you made a non-resolution yesterday to maybe, sorta kinda lose weight (or quit smoking, drinking, nose picking, whatever) you are being lazy, you are scared and you're being sorta selfish.

Do you even know what you are scared of? I sure didn't at the time but I knew that I was scared to confront my obesity. But when I finally got the courage to make a real change, that courage grew.  The bravery that I already had was multiplied by the awareness that I really can overcome anything.  I was getting to know the me that was buried under all that fear. Fear of change, fear of failure, fear of others opinions on the changes I was making, in time it all just fell away.

Eventually it became less about losing weight and more about gaining something else: Me.

Since I can't send future you back in time to talk to present you, this is my letter to you:

Dear Friend,

I like you a lot. I want you to be around for a long time. You are beautiful, smart, funny, lovely and wonderful human being. And its for all those reasons that I want you to find it in yourself to take action and make a resolution. I will love you at a size 2, 10 or 20 or where ever you land on the scale. But I want you to be healthy. Your family needs you to be healthy.

Losing weight and making changes is scary and overwhelming. Do it for the ones that love you, but more importantly do it for you. I promise that I will be here to cheer you on through the good and the bad. I'll even wear a cheer outfit and use pom poms if that's what it takes to get you moving.

Goal by goal, discover the person you have been hiding under all that fear. The freedom that follows is your reward and something you will never regret choosing to work towards. I know you have the courage in you to make this change.

Love, me - some one that's been there, 

gets it and knows you have what it takes to change

• • • • •

So what are my resolutions? Well I haven't made any...yet. I'm trying to decided what I'd like to do. Because if I said 'lose weight' y'all might chase me through town with pitchforks. So I am going to take some time to think about it because I want to choose something big.
As for my progress, I am down two more pounds this week. Yay! This week was so great, I was really back in the groove and I am looking forward to getting to goal. I've been looking for more races to run when the weather warms up and I'm thinking about how I'd like to expand my fitness and maintenance goals.

I'm also super excited to introduce you to the newest Medifast bloggers!

~*Stephanie at A Grande Life*~ 

~*Alison at O My Family*~

~*Jessica at The Unemployed Mom*~

~*Mariana at The Domestic Buzz*~

I hope you will show them all the love and support you have been so kind to give me over the last 44 weeks. They are all very excited to start this journey and take charge of their health!

Happy New Year everyone! Here's to overcoming our fears, challenging ourselves, climbing some mountains and taking charge of our health.

Month One: -16 lbs

Month Two: -5 lbs

Month Three: -6 lbs

Month Four: -6 lbs

Month Five: -6 lbs

Month Six: -8.5 lbs
Month Seven: -7.5 lbs
Month Eight: -5 lbs
Month Nine: -2 lbs
Month Ten: -5 lbs

Week forty one: -2
Week forty two: -2
Week forty three: -0
Week forty four: -2  (and seriously people, I've been spelling 'forty' wrong for like three weeks now and no one said anything? sheesh.)

Total: 73 lbs gone forever!
Current weight: 167 lbs
Distance from goal: 27 lbs!!

If you're interested in trying Medifast, I have a great deal for you! Use the code TURNIP56 to get $50 off an order of $275.


Check out Medifast's new customer savings program! 

*FTC Disclosure: Medifast provides their products for my personal use for free. I am not paid or compensated in any other way for mentioning their products. All thoughts written here are mine. I love complaining so I would tell you if I didn't like something in the program. :)

~*Stephanie at A Grande Life*~ 

~*Jenni at Jenni From the Blog*~

~*Stephanie at Goober Monkey*~

~*Alison at O My Family*~

~*Jessica at The Unemployed Mom*~

~*Mariana at The Domestic Buzz*~

The holidays are finally over! 

Now what?

Personally, I'm recovering from my food hangover. While I'm okay with my indulgences over the weekend I'm more than ready to get back on track. So how do we do this? Well we can't turn back the clock, un-eat the cookies or un-drink the wine and eggnog....umm unless you had waaaay too much of it and it un-drank itself. (If ya catch my meaning.)

Here's what you can do...it's what I did anyway.

• Start your day with a huge glass of water. I followed that up with more water and a Medifast meal.
• Sweat it out! I didn't get a lot of opportunity to work out on Monday. So I had a little dance off when no one was looking. But we went to the aquarium and did a ton of walking. 
• Get back on plan and stay there! Throw away the left-overs if you think you can't stay away from them (which is what I did with the mini cinnamon buns).

I am in full-on detox mode now and so glad for it. 

Here's the run-down of my holiday weekend. This is full disclosure people. Keep in mind that I did not really indulge in many off plan treats leading up to the holiday. Even at our office party I chose on plan foods for lunch and then had the rest of my 'green' for dinner that night.

Friday we went out for Mexican. I got my usual chicken fajita (sans tortilla and the other fatty/high crab fixin's) and I treated myself to a margarita. 

Feliz Navidad!

I'm not sure if it's funny or sad that the watch I am wearing is a heart monitor/pedometer
to track my calories burned and steps taken. What a joke!

Saturday was a great, on plan day in preparation of brunch on Sunday. This was basically my damage control day. I knew I probably would not see a loss this week but definitely didn't want a gain! I was very methodical about what I ate, choosing the meals that would give me the lowest amount of total carbs for the day. Also I drank gallons of water - seriously, gallons.

Sunday I made a slew of bad foods for the family: pancakes, mini cinnamon buns, sausage, turkey bacon, scrambled eggs, biscuits with sausage gravy, hash brown casserole (mom's contribution)  and blood red OJ to wash it all down.

What I ate (and this wasn't all at once, this was grazing over a few hours): an egg white omelette, 1 piece of sausage (about the size of a silver dollar), 1 apple cinnamon pancake (a little larger than a silver dollar), 1 slice of bacon, 3 mini cinnamon buns (these were the Pillsbury kind. I unrolled them and made mini-buns), a few spoon fulls of the hash brown casserole and a cup of coffee with half and half. Because I grazed, I didn't really eat other meals throughout the day but had salad for dinner that night. 

And eggnog. Let's not talk about the eggnog. ;)

As far as eating goes, it was a crappy day. But I'm pleased with the level of control that I had. I feel more confident about future holidays. I didn't have the insane level of anxiety that I had in the past. Normally I just want to run away from these events. I get myself so worked up that I end going through the tiresome cycle of obsessing, binging, guilting, shaming and binging some more. Instead I just let myself enjoy it and, for the most part, move on. Once again I also remembered that I have no desire to eat that stuff all the time. 

In the end, Santa brought me a big goose egg this weekend.  (heh. goose egg, egg nog. go figure.)

I'm a little sore about that. I left him great treats!

Whatevs, Santa!

I had a small loss earlier in the week - but obviously I un-did that by letting loose-ish over the weekend. I'm pretty happy with the result considering the treats I allowed myself. I didn't go crazy but I wouldn't classify my eating as reserved. Though I do feel that I was in control the entire time. That was really important to me. And that is really the goal of this whole process for me. To lose weight but more importantly learn how to control the behaviors that made me gain weight in the first place.

But now it's time to go hardcore. I've blown every deadline I've set for myself on this plan. And before I know it, March will be here and I will have been on this plan for a year. I know its completely reasonable and acceptable to take more than a year to lose 100lbs. But I want(ed) to be done before the one year mark got here. 

No more treats, no more 'special' days, no more booze (can you hear me crying?). I will run despite the bitter cold and exercise indoors when the weather is rainy or snowy. My goal is to exercise five days a week. 'I will stay On Plan' is my new inner dialogue.

This is it folks. We are in the homestretch. I WILL be done before my Medi-versary. 

Let's do this!

Month One: -16 lbs

Month Two: -5 lbs

Month Three: -6 lbs

Month Four: -6 lbs

Month Five: -6 lbs

Month Six: -8.5 lbs
Month Seven: -7.5 lbs
Month Eight: -5 lbs
Month Nine: -2 lbs
Month Ten: -5 lbs

Week fourty one: -2
Week fourty two: -2
Week fourty three: -0

Total: 71 lbs gone forever!
Current weight: 169 lbs
Distance from goal: 29 lbs!!

If you're interested in trying Medifast, I have a great deal for you! Use the code TURNIP56 to get $50 off an order of $275.


Check out Medifast's new customer savings program! 

*FTC Disclosure: Medifast provides their products for my personal use for free. I am not paid or compensated in any other way for mentioning their products. All thoughts written here are mine. I love complaining so I would tell you if I didn't like something in the program. :)

~*Stephanie aka Goober Monkey*~

~*Jenni aka Jenni From the Blog*~

~*Eileen aka Bringing Up Bronwyn*~

~*Amanda aka Mandalyn and the stinky cheese*~

~*Laura akaWho you are is Enough*~

Hey everyone!

So sorry for the delay. Our daughter had us up all night - I even got barfed off. Then there was the urgent trip to see the doctor this morning. Poor Izzy has an ear infection. :( But she's on an antibiotic, has numbing drops and got some super cool stickers from the doctor, so she's okay.

Are ya ready to hear who won?

First up, the instant winners. Y'all were quick. I really did not expect that riddle to be solved so quickly. Hmmm....maybe this means that I am not so quick.

I'm a place to rest your elbows & sometimes a rear end

I never leave my station, rarely crack and never bend

I'm sleek, tough and cool and keep track of what you eat

Be sure to clean me off and I won't tell when you cheat!


Answer: The kitchen counter!

The first two people to guess correctly were:

Jen & Lauren, you have 48 hours to email me at mommabrown08@gmail.com. If I don't hear from you I will have to pick a new instant winner and that would give me sad face. And after last night's no-sleep vom-fest, my face is already pretty sad. 

Now for the random winners! (Please note the I have taken the instant winners out of the equation.)
Here's the full list and the winners are:

Y'all have 48 hours to email me at mommabrown08@gmail.com. If I don't hear from you I will have to pick a new instant winner and that would give me even MORE sad face. It might give me sad butt too...and really, do we want to go there?

Congrats everyone! I hope you enjoy these products as much as I do. Choose health!

It seems all too appropriate that my first 5k, a goal I didn't even know I had, would be during a time of giving thanks. Because I am thankful. I'm thankful for this program, this opportunity, this new life and my renewed health. Most of all I am thankful for the community that I've found with this new life.

When I decided to start running, there was no great inspiration, epiphany or inspirational quote that made me want to get up and run. I would have been fine to ease along on this program and let the diet do the work. But really, how is that making a change? How would that help me maintain my goal weight? So I knew I needed to suck it up and exercise but I really didn't want to pay for a gym. I have sneakers - I guess I better start pounding the pavement. 

I knew if I was going to stick with this, I had to make it public. Boy oh boy I was kicking myself for that. As soon as I told a few people, and then a few more, that question started coming. 

'Did you sign up for a race?'

Uhhh....what? HELL NO.

But I decided to take the accountability to the next level. I told my dietitian Jen that I was doing the C25k and she immediately volunteered to meet up with me and do a 5k. Then my friends Amanda and Alison got on board as well. Week by week people on Twitter and Facebook cheered me on as I ticked off the C25k sessions. People offered advice and encouragement when I tried to convince myself that this just wasn't for me.

Finally the big day came and as I made the hour drive to Towson to meet my friends it felt like someone else was driving my car. Someone else was meeting these people and doing this race. Then when I was just about seven miles from the race and I came back to myself. I got a giant knot in my stomach and was sure that I would get a case of the runner's craps before I even got my bib because holy shit I am doing this. I am running a race....with other people.

Long story short: I kicked that 5k's ass. 

Here we are, just getting started. I was surprised to see Christian and Izzy in the stands. We had come separately and I knew he would be there. But I got the impression he would be late. It was a nice surprise to see them waving to us from the stands.

This wasn't easy. I was used to running around my neighborhood. I had a fantastic cheering squad coaching me along and I really don't know if I could have done it without Jen and Amanda. There were lots of steep hills that I think I might have given up on and walked had they not been there. 

I did have to stop once around mile two to catch my breath. I probably took the hill a little too quickly. And honestly I think the issue was more mental than physical. As I got near the top of this hill I knew I was going to have to walk. I started to get mad at myself for needing to stop and panicking about it a little. I tried to keep going but I couldn't catch my breath and by the time I stopped it felt like my throat was closing up. After a few deep breaths and a couple yards of walking, we all started running again. I made it to the end without stopping again. 

On the way back into the stadium I had the additional surprise of seeing one of my closest friends, Kiely, standing at the entrance. I nearly had a Gump moment when I saw her and had to stop myself from running over to hug her. 

My chip time was 35 minutes and 55 seconds. Not the 34 minutes I had hoped for but better than the 36 minutes I would have settled for. 

I am so thankful for my husband, Izzy and the friends that came out to support me. I wish I could really express how much it means to me. These ladies have been some of my biggest cheerleaders and I am proud to call them my friends. Even when I didn't have complete faith in myself, the faith they have in me fills in the gaps and keeps me going. 

I'm also thankful for all of you - the people on Twitter, Facebook and my readers. Your kind comments and words of encouragement were in my ears on Sunday. Thank you for taking the time to cheer me on. I hope I can return the favor one day.

This will be a day that I reflect upon often with pride, joy and gratitude and it will not be forgotten any time soon. Thank you for helping me achieve this goal.

• • •

Much to my surprise I am down a whopping 3lbs this week! Woo hoo! With the holiday coming up, I won't be looking for those big numbers next week. But I'm going to do what I can to come close. I'm making the meal this year and my poor guests....they have no idea what they are in for. Everyone will be getting a holiday version of Lean & Green! I know, I'm terrible.

I'm also going to throw some extra miles in there to safeguard against anything that accidentally falls into my mouth. ;)

So...I need to pick a new goal. Another 5k? Something completely different?

Oh and don't forget! Just a few hours left to try and win my Medifast giveaway! The winner will be announced tomorrow...whenever I get around to it. I promise, I will try to make it before noon (EST).

Month One: -16 lbs

Month Two: -5 lbs

Month Three: -6 lbs

Month Four: -6 lbs

Month Five: -6 lbs

Month Six: -8.5 lbs
Month Seven: -7.5 lbs
Month Eight: -5 lbs
Month Nine: -2 lbs

Week thirty seven: -1 lbs

Week thirty seven: -3 lbs (wowza!)

Total: 66 lbs gone forever!
Current weight: 174 lbs
Distance from goal: 34 lbs!!

If you're interested in trying Medifast, I have a great deal for you! Use the code TURNIP50 to get $50 off an order of $275.

*FTC Disclosure: Medifast provides their products for my personal use for free. I am not paid or compensated in any other way for mentioning their products. All thoughts written here are mine. I love complaining so I would tell you if I didn't like something in the program. :)

~*Stephanie aka Goober Monkey*~

~*Jenni aka Jenni From the Blog*~

~*Tiffany aka Momnom*~

~*Eileen aka Bringing Up Bronwyn*~

~*Amanda aka Mandalyn and the stinky cheese*~

~*Laura akaWho you are is Enough*~